December 2010
Over the past few months I seem to have developed this uncanny ability to see through every form of bullshit out there. Arrogance, marketing schemes, legal jargon, etc. And it’s made me really, really hate the human race. We’re a sick type of animal. If any other species started to evolve in ways that reflected the human race, after initial intrigue, we’d suddenly realize its...
Finally merging my two most-used handhelds and jumping on the iPhone train this Christmas.
Did you know that armadillos can give you leprosy? That would be scarier if 95% of us weren’t naturally immune to the bacteria that cause the disease.
Anonymous asked: in response to your response to the curious one, i completely agree.
as a girl who occasionally sees other girls, i am the same. it's never a planned thing, and i never have to work for it, it just happens. I'm glad i'm not the only person who functions like this.
ps- you're one hell'uv a sexy bitch. let's drink to that.
as a girl who occasionally sees other girls, i am the same. it's never a planned thing, and i never have to work for it, it just happens. I'm glad i'm not the only person who functions like this.
ps- you're one hell'uv a sexy bitch. let's drink to that.
November 2010
the biggest mistake i made all year
so i thought i’d see how many people i could engage and detatch in an admirably short period of time, how many heads could be cut on the block of my bed, casualties of the casual, bleeding like a boy on a pissy street, remember, the two o’clock shots that startled you as i released the blade and ruined my futon. isn’t it a shock when the sirens suddenly stop and the blue lights...
“I used to be self conscious about my height, but then I thought, fuck that, I’m...”
– Daniel Radcliffe (via youcantry)
last hope
stop with that cigarette blowing ashes in my coffee. chocolate crumbs are okay so the red plastic ashtray goes under the table, but everyone can eat my brownie. talk about teeth. sini’s got twelve bad ones, at $800 a tooth. we all get quiet and do the math, think about that for a minute.
there’s nothing to be done about a cigarette smoked, about big feelings melted into puddles,...
Anonymous asked: When you have sex with girls, are they your friends, or are they-- I'm not sure-- just other people, you're not bi are you? or maybe you are.
asking as a curious straight girl to what may be an enlightened girl. not just any creeper.
asking as a curious straight girl to what may be an enlightened girl. not just any creeper.
Anonymous asked: I feel creepy writing on your tumblr when you don't really know me, but you are a fantastic writer, is that what you were going to school for?
kittykittykittyprettykatherine asked: lets have a lesbian relationship, I am over dick hahaha <3333
I gave my dog two pickles and he’s carrying them around like they’re his babies.
my messages are working
and yours aren’t.
Anonymous asked: Besides your current ex-boyfriend, with whom is the best sex you've ever had?
Anonymous asked: what, pray tell, disconcerted you so vulgarly? body in the closet?
What’s your favorite color? Purple What’s your name? Jessica Who are your best friends? I’ve never been one to keep one close friend, I have a few Have you ever “liked” one of these friends? Yes What’s your favorite snack? Salty things What’s your favorite drink? Diet pepsi What’s your favorite store? Mmm Urban probably, so sad I no longer have my discount What color is your...
I know you’re busy, but please won’t...
the essay, the hardest part
Relax, breathe. Get it together. The lock was wrenched and we slid inside, the mouldering smell of an underground place. Sam shoved bills into a palm that extended from the shadows and we stepped down into a spare, smoke-ridden basement where a small crowd sat on rugs and cushions spread along cement ledges that rose up like opium beds in front of a makeshift stage. A red upright piano stood...
If I wanted to see tits and cunnilingus, I'd look...
I just found something extremely disconcerting.
I don’t know what to do about it. I feel like my parents must have when they found out I was having sex or sneaking out on a school night. Except this is worse, much worse, and I wish more than anything that I’d never found it at all.
redpiranha-deactivated20101203 asked: What are you doing up here?!
We should get some people together and hang out
We should get some people together and hang out
redpiranha-deactivated20101203 asked: I know I know I know, I was just super tired of it today more than usual I guess. But not just that....I dunno. I just had to get it out...haha.....
Are you really back in vermont?
Are you really back in vermont?
The future we read about and saw in movies and television shows looks like it’s actually happening. Hand-held touch screen devices we keep in our pocket with applications for nearly every convenience, deco houses and art that resemble things straight out of Futureworld, powder we can add to water to make it vitamin-fortified and nutritious in an instant! Microwaves! Spandex! In-vitro...
Personally, my favorite part of Leslie Nielsen’s career was his guest appearance on The Golden Girls as a news anchor named Jerry who wears a girdle and dates slutty Blanche. Fuck Airplane!, that was comedy. “I’m a grown man and I want to be with the woman I love - I’m going back to Christina.”
Just kidding, Airplane! was the shit. And don’t call me Shirley.
if we don't treat the internet with the RESPECT it...
we get comcast.
fuck.
according to the internetz
October 5th is the most common birthday in America. This is speculated to be because 9 months prior to this date is New Years/Christmas, and a lot of people get drunk and have unprotected sex when you throw a bit of mistletoe over the sangria. Alternatively, May 22 is the most uncommon birthday. I’m not sure what exactly happens at the end of August to turn people off, but people are just...
I'm sorry
I made it seem like you don’t care. Because you do. I know you do.
my beauty supreme,
yeah you were right about me But can I get myself back from underneath this guilt that will crush me? And in the choir I saw our sad messiah; He was bored and tired of my laments Said, “I’d die for you one time, but never again.” I love you so much, but do me a favor, baby, don’t reply ‘Cause I can dish it out, but I can’t take it I love you so much (never have...
I helped my mom move into her new house today, and in the process I learned that she put several things away in storage for me when I move into my new apartment next summer, including a washer/dryer, gold velvet couch, dining table set, and (my favorite) her great-grandmother’s piano. I’m excited to have something to look forward to, even though it seems eons away.
Summer days more likely that you notice breezes Winter days more likely that you notice heat When I’m gone more likely that you notice me In the dark it’s more likely that you notice light In the light more likely that you notice night Hungry more appreciation for that meal Dead broke more appreciation for that grill A bad day’ll make you really notice ones that’s...
I’m going to go take the puppy for a walk to see if he’s afraid of the snow.
